7 Solutions for the Control Freak

1. The Sniff Test: Is there a chance?

Start simple and ask:

  • Is there a chance I can achieve this?
  • Do I have, or can I find, the required resources?
  • Does success rely on someone else, and if so, can I influence him?

“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.” — Steve Maraboli

2. Do I want it badly enough?

If the answer is no, don’t waste your time. Tony Robbins teaches that 80 percent of achievement is psychological (our why), and only 20 percent is mechanics (the how). If you can inspire yourself to act, how will take care of itself.

3. What are my emotions telling me?

Think about the decision at hand. What emotions come up? Do I feel miserable or empowered? There are no negative emotions. Both the good and the bad are messengers, and they are telling you to fight for it or forget it.

4. Am I attached to the outcome or loving the process?

One woman fills her thoughts with making her first million, the other on making 50 sales calls each day and being present in enjoying the conversations.

5. What’s my attitude?

And if I adjust it, will it affect the outcome? Attitude is a rare example of something that’s always 100 percent within your control.

“Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.” — Zig Ziglar

6. How do I spend my time?

By extension, what do I think and talk about most of the time? Are you focused on the economy, politics or your competitors’ behavior? Or have you given up clever Facebook diatribes in favor of what’s within your power, such as reading a brilliant business biography or polishing your résumé?

“We become what we think about most of the time.” — Earl Nightingale

7. Have I done my best?

This last question invites us to do two things:



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